Imagine living in a small tribe in northern Europe, 15,000 years ago.
You look around. Snow surrounds you. Freezing winds chill your bones. And your tribe is running low on food.
More intense yet, as the leader in your tribe, everyone — including the women and children — are looking to you. You can see it on their faces.
Without saying anything, they each implicitly ask you, Where will our next meal come from?
It’s your responsibility to provide for them. If you don’t they will viciously meet death.
In that situation, what would you do?
Would you have time to relax? If there were a mythical computer nestled inside your camps nicest tent, do you think you’d have time to cruise the internet or watch netflix?
The answer is obvious. Your only concern would be ensuring everyone survived.
Full focus would be placed in one direction — finding food.
Where’s the next mammoth I’m going to take down?
What does the migrational path of the mammoths usually look like at this time of year? How can I find a food source to hold over the tribe until then? What will I do if this happens? But what if that happens?
As the leader, you’d better be ready for every situation. You’d be a man on a mission — with a crystal clear direction.
No focus whatsoever would be on relaxing, getting women to like you — or anything else for that matter.
Paradoxically, this would have made you an extremely attractive man to every woman in that tribe. Especially once you found food and put everyone’s mind to rest. But as the leader, you’d hardly have time to care about interest from women.
And that’s the point.
Your all-encompassing focus on the task at hand would reek of authentic masculinity. Women love this.
What’s the Trait that Makes You an Attractive Man?
We’ll get there in a second. But first, let’s fast forward back to the present day. Unlike 15,000 years ago when conditions were brutal, life today is a little different…
With exclusive spas, welfare systems if things get tough, and comfort all around us, life is easy today. We expect to be able to relax and chill and enjoy. And hey, I’m not complaining.
Life in the 21st century isn’t so bad…
But here’s the problem: as men, it’s become easy to be spineless, directionless, and soft. Especially these days.
How many men have you met recently who truly felt connected to their masculinity? Think about it. Not many, right? But this shouldn’t be a surprise.
You don’t exactly need to be Zeus to bang out a spreadsheet, write code, or input data.
Men aren’t required to embody their masculine traits anymore. Maybe this is why most of the men we meet today are more comparable to sheep than they are wolves.
Luckily, you do NOT need to follow the herd of sheep. You can stand out as a man and become a naturally attractive man. No matter how you look, what your age is, or how much money you make. Best of all?
If you embody just one trait, you will immediately stand out.
So, what is it? The one trait that instantly makes you an attractive man?
Live with Purposeful Direction
This is the one trait of all dominant men — the kind of man women are hardwired to desire. Think back to our story about the leader of the tribe in dire straits. This character, based on a real life example, is the representation of true masculinity. A man on a mission — living each moment with purposeful direction.
Everything he’d think about, and certainly everything he’d do, would be in service of his purposeful direction.
Not much confusion about his current mission. Simple: Find some fucking food for the tribe so that everyone survives. This is what masculine, purposeful direction looks like.
You can instantly choose to live like this man.
Whatever you currently do — do it fully. Your work? Your career? Commit to what you do entirely. Even if it’s only a short term working situation — master it. Why not dig your teeth into your work and give it everything you’ve got?
Or, here’s another one. You know that side-project you’ve been dabbling in for a while? The one you’re secretly passionate about? Why not commit to it? Tackle it with purposeful direction.
Doing so not only will energize you, and fulfill you, but living in this way has the side benefit of making you a naturally attractive man. The kind of men women desire and men admire.
But you may be asking yourself something…
What Does 21st Century Purposeful Direction Look Like?
Purposeful direction. That is the trait of masculine champions. To illustrate what this increasingly rare trait looks like these days, I have three examples of men who embody purposeful direction wholeheartedly.
First up? Elon Musk.
This man dedicates his life to his mission. He’s here to help the human race expand beyond earth. Everything he does — his work at SpaceX and Tesla — is in service of that mission.
After reading his biography, it’s obvious this man is clear about where the hell he’s going.
Next, think Michael Jordan. Especially during his career, MJ embodied purposeful direction to the fullest.
MJ’s mission as a basketball player was simple. Become the best player the world has ever seen. After reading his trainer’s book, Relentless, I can assure you MJ was more than natural talent. The dude was intensely focused.
He trained three times a day — even on gamedays. Moreover, MJ meticulously measured his diet, his training, and his recovery. Everything he did was in service of his direction.
Finally, if you’ve watched Suits, Harvey Specter is the fictional embodiment of masculine direction.
In the show, there’s no fucking around with Mr. Specter. The man is on a mission — at all times. He’s there to dominate. To win. He’s on a mission to be the best closer in New York City.
When you begin living in this way — with purposeful direction — you instantly become a more attractive man. Even if you’re an ugly mofo like I am… 😉
But why? Why does having purposeful direction create such a magically attractive man of our you? There’s two primary reasons.
Allow me to share, while also explaining the psychology behind each principle. This way, when you become more attractive you’ll understand why the changes you’re about to experience will be occurring.
#1: Masculine Detachment
Masculine detachment is the ability to stay emotionally grounded when women test you, challenge you, and otherwise interact with you.
By purposely moving in a clear direction, you can finally embody masculine detachment around women — and this makes you extremely attractive.
By placing such deep focus on your primary purpose, not much else affects you deeply. Certainly a casual dating partner won’t throw you off your kilter. How could she? With due respect to her, she’s not what your universe is centered around.
By living with purposeful direction, you embody masculine detachment.
Your masculine orbit was already in balance long before she entered your world. And everything will remain in equilibrium whether she stays in your orbit or not.
This makes you rare — and a very attractive man. You think differently. Unlike most men…
You’d like her around. Absolutely. But your eye is always focused on something bigger. You’re a man on a mission — dominating your direction.
I imbedded this picture because while Angelina looks at him, Brad looks as if he’s planning his next big move. He looks fully in-tune with his purpose.
Who knows if that estimation is true, but this picture is a great example of what purposeful direction looks like.
#2: Masculine Distance
When you’re all in on your masculine purpose, you don’t have much spare attention. How could you?
The second reason you become a naturally attractive man by embodying purposeful direction is because you finally give women distance. This makes her think about you, miss you, and admire you.
Consider our story of the chief. When the tribe is running low on food and you’re the head-honcho, you don’t have too much time to wine-and-dine the cutie in the tribe.
She’s going to have to work to get your scare resource. Your scare resource that is your spare time. By commting to your purpose, you’re busy. You speak with your actions, sub-communicating the following…
Hey, I’m busy doing me. I’ve got a purpose I’m moving towards. I got shit to do.
While she may not always like this, deep down, a woman wants a man who’s difficult to truly have. A man who’s time is valuable. She wants a man who’s masculine orbit is already in balance.
For more on this topic, I highly recommend reading David Deida’s classic book, The Way of the Superior Man.
Now, to conclude our discussion, I have something important to ask you…
How Will You Apply This In Your Life?
What will you do to connect with your purposeful direction as a man? What will you spend your time directing your energy towards? Do you know? Is your answer clear?
As Tony Robbins famously put it, clarity is power.
By taking the time to reflect, and then answer these questions, you’re taking your first big step in the right direction. Answering helps you clearly define your purposeful direction as a man.
My man, I’m excited to continue this conversation. Share your answers with me in the comments box below.
To your peak,
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